(…And how you can too, mama—without spinning your wheels or hiding forever.)
Freelancing is like skydiving in pajamas—thrilling, freeing… and occasionally terrifying when you realize the parachute might be fake. That, my friend, is Imposter Syndrome: the creeping feeling that you’re a fraud, a fluke, or closer to being exposed than celebrated. Especially for us 40‑something work‑from‑home mamas—balancing teen schedules, laundry mountains, and business dreams—it hits hard.
But guess what? You can beat it. And the tools you need aren’t rocket science—they’re mindset shifts, practical systems, and permission to claim your success. Ready to kick Self-Doubt to the curb? Let’s get into it.
What Is Imposter Syndrome, Anyway?
Imposter Syndrome (IS) shows up as:
- “I don’t deserve this client; they’ll see through me.”
- “Everyone else is better at this than I am.”
- “One mistake and poof—they’ll drop me.”
It comes in flavors: Perfectionist, Expert, Soloist, Super‑Mom, Natural Genius. Been there? Yep, me too.
IS doesn’t check resumes—it hits top performers and new freelancers alike. Tackling it isn’t about ignoring it—it’s about naming it, understanding it, and developing a plan.
Here’s how it breaks down:
| Syndrome Style | Your Inner Script | What It Feels Like |
|---|---|---|
| Perfectionist | “Everything must be flawless.” | Exhausted, burnt out, frozen by fear |
| Expert | “If I haven’t done X, I’m a fraud.” | Reluctant to charge full price |
| Soloist | “I should do this alone.” | Avoiding asking for help or hiring help |
| Super‑Mom | “I should juggle work, teens, and household perfectly.” | Overwhelmed, guilty at self-care |
| Natural Genius | “If it’s not effortless, I’m failing.” | Anxiety around challenges or learning curves |
✨ Insight: Figure out which style you fall into most—this helps you target the right fix.
1. Normalize It: You’re Definitely Not Alone
Step one: admit it. Everyone from Maya Angelou to your neighbor who just scored a $50K contract has felt like a fluke. According to a University of Melbourne study, over 70% of us—creative pros included—face these doubts regularly.
Experts, leaders, even CEOs have imposter doubts. You’re normal. It’s human. (Phew.)
What to Do:
- Keep a cheat-sheet: “Imposter popped today because I charged full-price, pitched a big client, or said ‘no’ to extra requests.”
- Say it out loud: “That’s just the IS voice again.” Helps take its power away.
2. Own Your Wins—Big and Small
We shrug off our wins, but cling to mistakes like our lives depend on it. Bad habit! Let’s fix that:
- 🏆 Create a “Win Diary”: every time you send a deliverable, land a client, get a compliment—write it down.
- 💌 Add gratitude notes to each success: “So grateful to have worked on XYZ,” even if it’s small.
- 🗓 Weekly review: spend 5 minutes reflecting on challenges faced and wins earned.
Why It Works:
- Moves the spotlight from fear to evidence
- Anchors your confidence in actual results
- Makes “I deserve this” a quiet, daily mantra
3. Reframe Your Inner Critic
That voice that whispers “Fake!”? It’s not you. It’s the leftover voice of past expectations, perfectionism, or fear of failure.
Reframing shifts the narrative:
- “They hired me because I can do this. I just haven’t done it yet.”
- “Learning steps = growth. Growth is good.”
- “I’ve helped X, Y, Z—numbers don’t lie.”
Simple Table for Reframing
| Critic Says | Reframe Response |
|---|---|
| “They’ll see through me.” | “They hired me—they want me here.” |
| “I’m not experienced enough.” | “Every expert started where I am.” |
| “What if I mess up live?” | “Mistakes teach. I choose short lessons over unfulfilled fears.” |
| “I can’t charge full rate.” | “My time and expertise deserve respect and reward.” |
| “I should handle everything solo.” | “Asking for help is smart—not weak.” |
Practice one reframe daily until it becomes your new default script.
4. Build a Support System (Yes, Even Mamas Need Backup)
This is critical: don’t go lone-wolf. Vulnerability builds bridges—and confidence.
- Peer groups: freelancer/VA circles, mastermind groups, or book-club buddies with shared goals
- Mentors/instructors: someone ahead of you who can guide, reassure, and validate progress
- Accountability buddy: check in weekly. Celebrate wins, brainstorm challenges.
- Professional help: coaches or even therapists—talking through IS is completely valid.
Your support system = your anti-IS army.
5. Develop Systems That Bite Doubt
When your fears hit, structures help you stay steady and show you what’s real.
Examples of Confidence-Boosting Systems
| System | How It Helps |
|---|---|
| Client prep checklist | Shows you have it handled before calls even start |
| Service process documentation | Clarifies steps you’ve refined—proof of expertise |
| Post-work surveys | Shows results clients appreciate—fight that self-doubt |
| Win wall (digital or physical) | Tangible reminders of capability when IS strikes |
| Monthly reflection journaling | Shows consistent progress over time |
Systems don’t just save time—they reinforce your skill.
6. Start Showcasing Your Progress (Even If It’s “Small”)
Show up small. Be visible. Because the more you do, the less power IS holds.
- Social shares: “Today I scheduled XYZ using Asana, and it felt great!”
- Blog/Social content: “My top 3 productivity tools this week”
- Collabs: team up on short projects; visible achievement = confidence
- Portfolio updates: turn small wins into proof you mean business
This is not bragging—it’s showing how you grow.
7. Go Easy on Yourself (Yeah, Even Mamas Need Grace)
Imposter Syndrome loves perfectionism. Let’s shrink it:
- Set “Good Enough” boundaries: 70% perfection now > 100% in never mode.
- Use timeboxing: 30 minutes to write an email? Done—no overthinking.
- “One breath, one step” mindset: stop multi-tasker mental noise; focus on the next step.
You don’t have to be flawless. You just have to show up, learn, and move forward.
8. Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection
When the perfectionist part of IS whispers “Not enough,” respond with celebration:
- 🎉 Share victories with your support squad
- 🎨 Treat yourself when you try something new (e.g., finalize that service page)
- 👀 Look back—saying “I didn’t think I could do that six months ago!” is valid
Glow in the progress—because it’s real and earned.
Case Study: How I Beat Imposter Syndrome
Meet me—43‑year‑old freelance VA-mama. My IS saga looked like this:
- Early months: Cancelled intro videos because I wasn’t “camera-ready”
- Launch time: Priced services too low, convinced I’d scare clients away
- After 30 days: My “win diary” was three pages long—clients loved work
- Support: Weekly check-ins with a fellow VA cleaned up doubts
- Systems: Client offboarding surveys reminded me of results
- Visible progress: Notebooks, portfolio, regular content—all visible proof
Now? I show up on camera, price confidently, and rarely let IS run the show. It didn’t vanish—but now I manage it.
Bonus Tools & Exercises
- Spotify playlist: 5 songs that energize and quiet the doubts
- One-minute journal prompt: “I am capable of…” (10x daily for a week)
- Visualization exercise: Picture your most confident self on a call—write it down
- Mantra creation: “I’ve got this. One step is enough.” Repeat.
These small mental resets keep your confidence muscles limber.
Final Words: You Deserve to Be Here
Imposter Syndrome is not a sign that you’re unworthy—it’s proof that you care. And caring deeply is a sign of commitment, not failure.
Takeaway:
- Name the wild inner critic
- Reframe with evidence
- Build rituals that champion your progress
- Show up— imperfectly, bravely
- Celebrate yourself
Because you’re building more than a business—you’re growing as a professional, a freelancer, a mum, a whole person. That is worthy of recognition, respect, and success. Every. Single. Day.
TL;DR: Imposter-Busting Cheatsheet
| Step | Action |
|---|---|
| 1. Normalize | Everyone feels this. You’re in great company. |
| 2. Name your IS type | Perfectionist, Expert, Soloist, Super-Mom, etc. |
| 3. Own your wins | Keep a “Win Diary” and revisit it often |
| 4. Reframe negativity | Use practical rebuttals to shush self-doubt |
| 5. Build support | Peer groups, mentors, accountability buddies |
| 6. Use systems | Checklists, templates, surveys to reinforce progress |
| 7. Show progress | Small wins shared = big confidence booster |
| 8. Celebrate wins | Rewards, gratitude, reflection to counter perfectionism |
xo,
Feby Lunag
(43‑year‑old VA mama, imposter-battling, mountain-loving creative)
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